getting triggered by other women

Y5sUGtu5Ts8TUv0Q8uQ2NZDsj7JQS3lde2eDy6Vp6A0Years ago, when I felt like I was flailing in my own relationships, I saw a love coach. She talked about how each of us have certain triggers in love. Triggers that cause huge and sudden oceans of emotion in us, uncontrollably ranging from uncomfortable to jealous,  raging to incredibly down in the dumps. Now I’m taking specifically about negative triggers.  There are positive ones too! And they feel amazing. I want to save those for another article and focus on what is hurting you and your love life right now…

When it comes to getting triggered, We don’t just have one . Truth be told, we actually have more than one trigger…often many! … know what I’m sayin’? 😉

There ARE ones though that tend to be much stronger than the others and cause us to say things, do things, feel things, that frankly, feel AWFUL.  I actually remember feeling really terrible one day, under the influence of one of these triggers…feeling like I couldn’t get out of it…like it was pressing me and I was sinking further and further in to sadness and darkness…

“I think your trigger is other women” my coach said.

ooo yea and ouch.

To help me with this over the years…I found a way to soothe myself in the moment.

First! 

It gets easier!! My triggers have weakened.  They come more quietly and leave more quickly.  I’m able to communicate them. I’m able to feel them instead of react to them.

good news… because If this has happened for me, it can happen for you! It’s possible to have smoothness in relationships.

Second! 

I wholeheartedly believe that EVERYTHING can be used to our advantage in love.  If something isn’t working for me in love. I turn it around so that it does. A clock can’t run counterclockwise…but it runs perfectly clockwise.

Same with love. Same with romance.

My tool for this?

I have compiled a list of many encouraging, self loving words that I personally use when I am triggered.:

This is adapted for my specific trigger of other women.  If this is one of your triggers I know this will help so much! If it’s not – use these as inspirations for your own…you can then go and write ones that just zing for you!

~ They are here to serve me become even more successful in relationships
~She is helping me become more feminine.
~Wow she is beautiful! I can be beautiful too!
~This woman is so (insert word) .  Thank you for showing me how (insert same word) I can be.
~I bet she is a reflection of me.
~There are zero women who are better than I am because this is not a competition.
~I don’t have to fight other women to be loved.
~There are plenty of men for this (these) other women.
~I AM worthy of attention and love. There is no woman or is more worthy of love or attention than I am.

Choose one or two of these that feel great to you and more importantly calm you down in the moment. For They will be the most effective.

And if you find yourself really hating and dreading every time you get triggered go here:

This is an audio article I wrote specifically on the topic of getting triggered. In the audio, I will go through with you the three great things about getting triggered and how this can make you more attractive and your relationship get even better, deeper, closer.  You also get to hear my voice and It’s free!

To a trigger free, pleasure filled relationship,

Love,

Amanda!

 

 

 

 

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